I have learned and still am learning that there is a huge difference between a child being “naughty” and a child simply acting like a child. I am done disciplining and getting on to my children for doing things that are perfectly normal for a child to do. I parented for too many years more worried about what other people were thinking about my children. I was putting way too much pressure on my children to grow up. I was putting way too much pressure on myself. I realized I was breaking their sweet spirits instead of building them into the children God wanted them to be. I had to gain confidence in my mothering skills. In our home we teach them to be obedient, kind and loving, not to be perfect. I want my children to have a childhood, one where they can be little.
Children are explorers, they learn things by touching. Within reason, that should be okay. I am done yelling at my kids to stop touching everything when God created them to explore the world around them. Seriously I felt like all i did all day was say “don’t touch that!” when it is normal for them to have that sense of wonder! Of course I am not going to let my child destroy things. I am going to be near them to educate them as they learn by feeling things around them.
Children are learning, they are going to ask tons of questions. This should be okay! I am done telling them constantly to stop talking and to please be quiet. How sad would be the day if they finally stopped coming to me and talking….Yes, I know you may have a child that NEVER STOPS TALKING and you are not sure you can handle it one more minute. Trust me I know how it is, we have a child that could talk all day and all night and it makes me want to sometimes cry! This is when you call Nana or Grandpa and put the child on the phone, they can handle it for awhile. 🙂
Boys need to be allowed to act like boys! Boys are going to run, wrestle, get rough and extremely dirty. I am done telling them to quit doing things that boys are suppose to do! No wonder boys are starting to get confused with who they are, we need to stop telling them to act like a girl. Boys are suppose to get messy, be adventurous and daring. Within reason, this should all be more than okay. This is how God created them! Now when they run up to me covered in dirt, I smile and they smile back.
When we go out to dinner, my children are going to laugh and talk to one another. They may even act a little silly, spill a drink and the baby may cry. I am going to be more concerned about the memory we are making as a family than about what others may be thinking. My children are going to act like children, not prim, proper and perfect adults. I regret all the meals we had out wasting all my time and energy trying to get my children to act “just right” that I missed out on actually enjoying my time with them. Our table is not going to look like the table next to us. Hello we have a ton of kids! Therefore keep on looking over folks, we don’t care anymore, we are having fun. 🙂 (When we go out we almost ALWAYS get compliments on their behavior. I think it is truly because we learned to relax and stop worrying so much!)
Children are going to make “messes” and have accidents. It is called being a child. I am done getting upset and hurting their feelings over things that should be okay. I make messes, I don’t always clean up immediately and I sometimes spill and break things. I don’t want them to be afraid thinking we can’t have a messy home, feel they have to hide things from me or stifle their creative little minds. Sometimes what looks like children making “messes” is them simply making beautiful memories! I know that can be hard, especially if you are like me and have a bit of an OCD problem. Therefore I do my best to just smile, LOOK AWAY, have a glass of wine and RELAX!
Children have emotions and should be allowed to have a bad day. I have bad days, you have bad days, and children have bad days. It is normal and it should be okay. I am done expecting them to be their very best 24-7, 365 days a year. A child having a bad day does not mean they are a bad child. Let’s just hope we don’t all have a bad day on the same day! 😉
I don’t want my children growing up to fast. I see it happening all around us. I want to create a childhood for my children where they can have the freedom to be a kid! Yes, I am raising them to be obedient, kind, loving and responsible, but I am always letting them know they can count on me to allow them to be a child too.